The border between loneliness and standards

‘Who could’ve believed this shit’.

I don’t know why this is echoing in my head, I wanted to say something different.
I don’t choose options; I choose out.
Just like the damn horrible #dream I had 2 nights ago, the lift’s floor opening, J. falling. I did not write it down, but it made me notice and think about how I didn’t consider killing myself or some other option, rather decided this is unacceptable hence a dream I can wake up from. Which I wonderfully did. Worse wake up ever,

And now as I was looking through my contacts options to call, none was worth the choice, and I decided not to.